Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Tears and Besos

My first actual day with the kids (yesterday) was, in 2 words, COMPLETELY OVERWHELMING. This week, it has hit me that I'm here for a year. A YEAR.

If you know one thing about me, it's that I'm not good at committing to anything. I don't even like making plans for dinner two days in advance, so you can imagine the kind of anxiety I'm having about having to stay here working and responsible for almost 50 kids for a year! haha. Let me say first of all, that Yuyo has been amazing. On the days that I've felt completely overwhelmed and carried on like a crazy person, he has been right by my side, comforting me by not only being here, but also telling me to pray about it and seek what God has to tell me. He's said this whole time that God has a plan and that I need to pray about it because He's the only one that can subdue me and make me feel complete in the fact that I'm here for a year. It's really amazing the people God puts in your life to make you better. He is one of them. Ok, I know, I know, enough cheesy for this post...haha.

I talked to Mom yesterday completely broken, homesick, scared, overwhelmed, and hormonal...needless to say my eyes were swollen all night. She continued to give me the same advice and assured me that people everywhere at home were praying for me and that "this too shall pass". Well...I felt everybody's prayers today.

At lunch, I was still feeling overwhelmed and anxious. You know that feeling when you're really nervous and your stomach churns and you feel like there's a brick on your chest? That's what I've been feeling since Sunday night. I got my afternoon class from 11:30-1:45 and they were GREAT. They (generally) followed the rules and listened to each other. I was so pleased with them. We've been focusing today and yesterday on actually listening to people when they talk, which is something that they really struggle with. It is built into Mexican culture. Even in groups of adults, if someone is talking, other people are always talking in the crowd. I'm all about living and accepting different traits of different cultures, but this is one of the most annoying things ever. Another thing that my kids do is if they have a question, instead of sitting in their seat and raising their hand, they come up to me, tap me, follow me around saying..."Miss, miss, miss, miss"...AHHHH! So...needless to say, my rules I went over today included "being a good listener, sitting in you seat and raising your hand if you need something, and always doing your best!!" among other things. I got them all to sign the rules, and it was evident that although we talked about them, they didn't understand what they meant. haha.

So...this afternoon at 4pm, the 3rd grade had their "open house" kind of meeting with all of the parents. My partner and I met in her room with all of our parents and gave a presentation about what we were doing this year, along with rules for different things like bringing in a bday cake, and convivios (like a get together with food) for Christmas and Halloween. I have been DREADING this meeting because the Colleen and I (one of the other English teachers...she's awesome and I love her) still don't really know what we're doing yet. Put young teachers who don't know what they're doing, just graduated from college, in a room full of parents paying for their kids to go to the most expensive school in Puebla......not a good mix. My compañera (my teaching partner, Ms. Lupita) did most of the talking. She had like a 20 minute powerpoint about everything and explained everything--except English. Another reason I was super nervous was because I was scared that my Spanish would be too stupid for all these parents who want to know about their kid's education. It turns out God is good. My Spanish was pretty good, and I just said at the beginning to forgive me because my Spanish wasn't the best ever. All the parents responded really well. My presentation was probably under 5 minutes, but I said everything I wanted to say, and looking into the sea of faces, I got many smiles and nodding affirmations. It was what I needed. I can't explain how light I feel right now. It's crazy to think that 12 hours ago, I felt a huge brick on my chest, and now, it's like I'm a new person. So many parents came up to me after the meeting and told me "my child has told me that they love you!" The Mom's of the boys ALL said "(insert name) told English teacher is so pretty and happy and smiley! I love her!" The parents who had questions and concerned I answered and they gave me besos (kiss on the cheek to say hello and goodbye) and said "anything I can do to help, don't hesitate to ask".

God is good, no?! Everyone told me it would be alright...and I knew it would be, I just didn't know when. I'm so thankful for Yuyo. I know I've already said it, but if this past week hasn't scared him away, I think he's a keeper!! ;)

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for your prayers. They have helped me more than you know. I'm serious. I think a lot of times, we just pray things, just to pray them without ever seeing the effect of them...well, I am proof that prayer does work. I am tranquila (calm) and I feel like this is truly where I'm supposed to be. My kids are great (for the most part...ha) and I already have favorites. Most being short little chubby Mexican boys. Looove them. haha. (Lisa will understand...right?)

I love you all.
<3 Besos y buenas noches! more thing. I was surprised yesterday when they called me to the office and the secretary asked me if it was my bday because I had a flower arrangement! Dud, Non, Tar, and Hay got Yuyo to find a flower arrangement and send it to me from them for my first day. Dad always sends Mom flowers on her first day--I told Yuyo that and he said..."yeah, but we're not married" hahahaha. I said "calmate Yuyo! I'm just saying!" So anyways, although it took all that was within me to not cry...I loved it. They're sitting in my window at school! Thanks Dud, Non, Tar and Hay. I love you.
My flowers!
We love to match!!
Meggie's sooo pretty!!
So am I!!
Today during one of our circle times on the rug (they LOVE the rug),  I asked them "What is one thing you want to learn this year?" A few students raised their hands, and I called on this sweet girl that I love. She said "To be just like you". hahahahahaha. I was like "Wowww! Ok!!" haha. It was great. I hope it was funny typed as it is in person. If only she could see this pic...
My finished bulletin board outside.
It says: Welcome Back.
Logging on the Future: Technology (The theme for this year.)
It rained all night, and this morning, there was hope!!
Sooo metaphorical! 


  1. AWESOME bulletin board!!!! I'm impressed! I'm sure you will do just fine this year, with ups and downs just like every teacher has. Keep it up! (PS- Thank your lucky stars for Yuyo, having a supportive boyfriend is just the best thing ever!)

  2. Wow! Your bulletin board is impressive. (Wish I could have you do mine.) Enjoyed reading your "news". We too are happy that Yuyo is with you ....and Meggie too! The flowers are pretty...Yuyo did good! Have a wonderful weekend.
    Love ya
    Non and Dud

  3. Oh brittan, you are such an inspiration! jk...but seriously!! im so proud of you and definitely know that lots of people are praying for you and keeping up with you!! love love love you!!!

  4. I am so proud of you! It's getting through days/weeks like that one that make you so much stronger and have so much more faith in future struggles! It sounds like you've got it made...the little girls want to be just like you and the little boys want to marry you! Seems everyone has a crush on you :) I will keep praying for you!

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  6. привет Бриттан. Хейден хорошо. это русский. Я люблю Хейден

  7. (hello brittan. hayden is well. this is russian. i love hayden)